Stay With the Out-Breath

 In Honorable Closure (HC), Letting Go, Mindfulness, Tools & Resources

We live in a culture where it is socially acceptable to rush, moving quickly from one task or interaction to the next. We convince ourselves there is so much to do, that we have no choice but to hurry.

Huffing and puffing through my weekly yoga class, I heard the substitute teacher admonish, “stay with the out-breath.”  With her long auburn tresses and lithe frame, she glided around the studio. She challenged the class with a series of poses that had us moving without interruption through Down Dog, Plank Pose, Cobra, and back again. Sometimes the instruction was to hold the pose through three in-breaths and out-breaths. Other times we would move sequentially with each in-breath.

“Stay with the out-breath.”  She repeated several times during the class. I’d never heard that instruction before. It struck me as profound not only in the context of my yoga practice, but also on the subject of Honorable Closure. During the exhalation portion of each pose I noticed my tendency to rush, squeezing out the last bits of air instead of allowing them to release on their own. Instead of staying with the fullness of each part of the pose, I was leaning into the next one, pushing to get to the inhale.

Rushing is so subtle yet pervasive that it has permeated how we breathe. We can live for days without food or water, but take away our capacity to fully inhale and exhale and we’re gone in minutes.  The out-breath is how we release the toxic carbon monoxide our lungs exchanged for life-giving oxygen. Both stages are simpatico, life-giving, inter-dependent.  If we stay with the out-breath, we practice letting go of what no longer serves us.

Letting go is a key element of Honorable Closure.  How we do one thing is an indicator of how we approach everything. Many people rush through endings and exits out of habit, or to avoid the inherent discomfort they bring. If you are going through an ending or exit, and want to expand your capacity to let go, work with your breathing.

Here is suggested practice:

Sit quietly for five minutes and bring mind-full attention to your breath. There is no need to change your breathing patterns. Just notice the phenomenon, how dynamic and reliable it is. There isn’t anything to make happen that isn’t already so.

As you inhale you might notice how it feels inside and towards the back of your nostrils or the sensation of your diaphragm rising. Notice any tendency to control your breath instead of allowing the body’s rhythm to prevail.  Can you stay with the out-breath without rushing? Just notice without judgment, blame, or mental commentary. Revel in the sensation of letting go, how dynamic that is, how capable you are of doing it.

Practice this every day for two weeks and see what happens. If you can let go of your breath, you can let go of anything, because breathing is everything.